If you’re sniffing a theme, this is a drop in the overflowing bucket (or toilet) of Malachi jokes.
While going potty before bed:
**dramatic sigh** Mama, is this pee-pee EVER going to come?
Right before the nursery-free Christmas Eve service that Jeremy and I in a fit of over-sugared Christmas spirit genuinely thought our kids could endure peacefully:
Malachi: **dancing on the chair** Pee pee pee pee pee pee pee!
Me: Malachi, no. We don’t do that unless we are at home. Some people don’t like to hear that, okay?
Malachi: O-KAY! Poo poo poo poo poo poo poo!
Me: Malachi! No. I’m serious and you know better. Stop.
Malachi: **dramatic pause, followed by a dead-serious stare-down with me, and then broken by GAS gas gas gas gas gas gas!
After finishing his bidness, in a super high-pitched voice:
Mama! Wook at those widdle baby poo-poos! Aw, they so cute. I wanna give them hugs.
Passing our neighbors’ lighted Santa sleigh and red-nosed leader:
Wook, Mama! It’s Santa and Sven!
At a random breakfast: