7 Quick Takes – I’m not sure why they don’t give me an award for the quality of my writing on Fridays.

Linking with Jen, because I’m sure she’s missed me, my sarcasm, and my riveting hair-care soliloquies.

  1. One of the benefits of being a stay-at-home-mom is that as soon as your husband comes home you get to regale him with a 45-minute stream of super-detailed stories about your exciting day. Stories about closet organization, nap-time productivity, exactly how many people were in each check-out line at Kroger, how many coupons you used/left at home/got rejected by the checker, and how much better your hair is doing now that you switched conditioner. The other day I was excitedly telling the tale of my hair’s vast improvement since I switched to TreSemme Climate Protection and I was pleasantly surprised when Jeremy responded with, “Oh yeah, I saw that conditioner in the shower” instead of his usual, “Yeah… Wait what? Sorry….”
    Me: You were looking at my conditioner?
    Jeremy: Yeah, I was wondering what this weird global warming soap is all about.
    Me: Global warming soap?  You mean because it’s called climate protection?
    Jeremy: Yeah, I thought that was weird.
    Me: It’s called that because it protects your hair from the climate, not because it protects the climate from…your hair.
    Jeremy: Yeah, I figured that out after I looked at it.
    That was so much funnier when it happened than it seems now…. Ok.
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  2. Malachi is improving his pronoun usage slowly but surely, although he still refers to himself as “Mal-chi” most of the time instead of the generic “I.”  Mal-chi do it!  Mal-chi want orange juice!  Mal-chi go paaaaaark!  He’s still a little unclear on the whole personal pronoun thing and frequently says “My” instead of “I.”  My do it!  My eat snack!  MY feed doggie!  Which always reminds me of this:

    …so me-sa maybe start calling him Jar Jar. How wude!
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  3. I’ve always had really vivid, realistic dreams, especially when I am pregnant. But over the past couple years I’ve started dreaming in movie.  My dreams actually switch from one scene to the next, switch perspective, and have background music. Once I dreamed I was Amy in an episode of Big Bang Theory. Not only was the entire dream pretty funny but it also had laugh tracks in the background.  I’m a little concerned for my sanity at this point.
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  4. Jeremy and I finally watched Frozen last night and of course I loved it, just like the rest of the world.  (Unrelated spoiler alert: Why didn’t the troll just tell them the secret in the first place? Would that not have saved 15 or so years of familial heartbreak and malfunction and potential future therapy costs?  Anyway.)
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    Have you seen the guy that sang a cover of “Let it Go” in all these different Disney voices?

    The part with Scuttle absolutely cracked me up because I used to do that. Malachi was pretty freaked out by the whole thing until we got to Winnie the Pooh. Then he looked at the little picture and said, “Hi Innie Poo! Is so cute!”
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  5. Have you heard of Listia?  It’s like E-bay, but free. It’s mostly a colossal waste of time, but I am 600 Pampers Rewards Points away from getting Malachi a free Cozy Coupe and I can usually muster up enough Listia credits to win some Pampers points auctions and you don’t care. Anyway, I listed an auction mostly for the bonus points but the woman who won had a problem and so an e-mail conversation ensued. Basically I would write her a thorough, polite, grammatically correct e-mail offering several solutions plus an apology and she would respond with something along the lines of:
    “yeah it didnt work”
    I mean, seriously. Can you not throw in a “Thank you” or at least some gratuitous punctuation? Does this kind of thing bother anyone else? Answer: yes. (Language alert, FYI).
    Also, if you want to join Listia, please use my link – I will be forever grateful.  https://www.listia.com/signup/5477022
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  6. It snowed again last week and Malachi’s make-up day was cancelled, so now we are having a make-up make-up day and of course they are calling for snow next Tuesday as well. I was “re-re-re-re ‘cited” about his first-ever school pictures but they aren’t offering a snow date for that so I’m just gonna save myself from the agony of dashed hopes and just operate on the assumption that those will get canceled as well.  But maybe I’ll try and do some cute portraits on my own because, you know, my track record is THE BOMB.
    100_3051 DSCN4903 102_3914.
  7. The other day I went into the farmer’s market by myself and got a little confused and overexcited by the free samples at the cheese shop.  I ended up spending 20 dollars on cheese because it was so tasty when taken out of context and seasoned with “I’m here alone and I need to reign myself in!” Then when my sister and I pulled it out to eat together it honestly smelled like a hot, sizzling cow patty and tasted about the same.  I decided to return it because, seriously.  When I took it back the manager said, “This is how this cheese smells and tastes.  Did you not see on the wrapper?  It’s called ‘Barnyard Smell.’ I’ll refund it but if you don’t like it, don’t ever buy it.”  So I guess she was right and I am grateful she refunded my money even though she treated me like a 2-year-old the whole time and wouldn’t let me finish a sentence. But for real? They made it smell like cow poop on purpose?  WHY?!
    ??????????Bon appetit.

7 Quick Takes

Fashionably joining Jen one day late.

  1. First of all, I hate going so long between posts. It seriously annoys me and sometimes I wonder how I could possibly not have found enough time to write a post but somehow I managed to stay up-to-date on all my shows. I guess it’s because I almost never watch my shows with out simultaneously doing something else more productive, which further confirms for me that I am too busy. And this post is going downhill fast because holy boring so let me entertain you with the list of shows I watch on a regular basis and include a clip from each because it’s Saturday and I know you need to fill your useless video quota:
    -Parenthood – Maybe my favorite show ever. It is so real and relate-able and I’m pretty sure I’ve cried in at least 50% of the episodes I’ve seen.  If that’s not a recommendation I don’t know what is.

    -Parks and Recreation – Not entirely appropriate – full disclosure here. But it is HILARIOUS. (this clip contains a bad word)

    -Big Bang Theory – because my husband IS Sheldon Cooper.

    (And perhaps I am Leonard.)
    -Downton Abbey – because the British accents and cool outfits fooled me into believing it wasn’t a shloozey soap opera for about 10 seconds.

    I’m just gonna do us all a favor and stop there.
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  2. K so. We went camping. All four of us. And thankfully we waited until mid-October so the weather would be nice and fallish and Virginia accommodated us by being 86 degrees on Saturday. But the nights were cool and Malachi got to go swimming so it all worked out. The kids had all sorts of fun swimming, hiking, getting dirty, playing on the playground, notsleeping in the tent, and doing really rustic, campy things like watching the iPod for hours on end every time we needed one of them to be still long enough to cook dinner. It was really great though – we will definitely do it again.
    camping.
  3. So. You know how people say things sometimes like, “She’s so happy she poops rainbows” or whatever? Well.  Pooping rainbows is not a skill that any of the Dillingers possess, and believe you me, if it was this whole potty training thing would be a lot more exciting. I think rainbows would be easier to clean out of the carpet. And I know you are thinking, “Yay!  More potty training talk!” so I will be a good little blogger and indulge you. We started again yesterday and after I declared that the star chart would fill up faster if we renamed it “I went on the carpet,” Malachi finally got the message and has done really well since. Let’s hope he gets it down by Tuesday (don’t pop my bubble, I know) because this whole sitting at home all day staring at your naked kid thing is getting kind of old. Kind of fast.
    booty
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  4. Although yesterday I did venture out of the house to go grocery shopping.  I waiting until the kids were in bed and dragged my exhausted self to the store to buy a flipping MOUNTAIN of groceries because I knew it was better than waiting til Monday and taking both kids. Got all the way through the check-out line and got carded for the first time in a looooong time (my theory is that they never card women with kids) and discovered….crap. No wallet. No ID. No money. No card. No dignity. The nice woman behind me offered to buy my “mommy juice” because “you need it” (I blamed my brainlessness on potty-training) but I had to put my cart in customer service, drive home and get the wallet, drive back and pay for groceries whilst having a panic attack when I realized I had almost 0 gas, get gas, drive back home, put groceries away, and then collapse on the couch with crackers and cookies and TV. But the whole time I was just grateful. Thank you God that the lady behind me is nice. Thank you that I wasn’t buying ice cream. Thank you that I didn’t run out of gas. Thank you that no one hit me when I ran that red light. THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU that my kids weren’t with me. Thank you that they didn’t make me start over. And let me tell you – that was totally a God-thing because God-in-Allie is grateful even when life stinks but Allie-in-Allie is just ticked off. And then I got home with 29 bananas. I’m not sure where the 21 came from that I didn’t pick up but I’m pretty sure some other late-night shopper is pretty annoyed now that they have to go back to the store before they can make their banana pudding or whatever.
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  5. I bought a new pair of Tom’s this week and I’m so excited. I joined ebates and their cash back combined with the 10-dollar coupon and free shipping Toms was offering caused the rational, must-save-the-most-money-possible-at-all-times part of my shopping persona to feel like, THIS IS IT. BUY THEM NOW. But after I bought them I started feeling really conflicted because, although Tom’s one-for-one thing sounds great in theory, in practice it actually can be really dependency-producing and local-economy-stunting. But on the other hand, maybe it’s still better than buying shoes made by some underage kid in a sweatshop somewhere? I really don’t know.
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  6. The steam…. it runneth out. Oh! Let’s make a case for impulse buying because it’s Saturday and you all just got paid. A few months ago my sister and I went to an Avett Brothers concert and I said it then and I’ll say it again – if you don’t like the Avett Brothers you are no longer invited to my life. Anyway, there was this awesome poster they were selling there – designed by an artist, unique to the city we were in, numbered, high-quality, etc. My sister bought one and I thought, “That’s appropriate. Her house is all musical and quirky and it fits.” And then I looked at the price and thought, $25 bucks for a poster? Uh. No. And you know what? Three months later I STILL regret it. Like, you’ve heard of buyer’s remorse? This is called tightwad’s remorse. Anyhoo, occasionally I’d look on ebay or something in vain but yesterday….I FOUND IT. And it’s beautiful. And I will either buy it or beg for it for Christmas but either way… it’s 40 bucks. FORTY. And if I had just bought it on impulse in the first place it would have been 27.5% cheaper but:

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  7. Well look at me getting to number 7 already (already = hours later). I’m getting new glasses today for the first time in four years and I am super, super psyched but also nervous to pick them out myself for the first time ever. Hopefully I don’t post a picture of myself next time looking a hot-mess, but hey! At least it will be a different kind of hot mess and I guess that counts for something.

L8r t8r.

How We Met

Linking with Grace at Camp Patton.

Every time I try to remember exactly when Jeremy and I met I get really confused, which is kind of ridiculous – you’d think I could remember something like that.  But apparently I can’t, so I just spent the last 10 minutes exploring this ancient artifact blast-from-the-past and looking at old blogs like this one and old pictures like these and….wow.  That was all sooooooooo long ago and I don’t even know how to process it.  I might need to spend an hour or seven in the near future reacquainting myself with that Memory Lane.

Anyway, apparently we met sometime in 2003, which means that we have known each other for 10 years now. 10! Whole! Years!  And amazingly it feels like waaaay more than that because I was such a child then and since that time I’ve had 2 years of highschool and 3 and a half years of college and 1 graduation and 3 jobs and two houses and 1 husband and 2 kids and a whole lot of maturing.  Moving on.

When Jeremy and I first “met” I was at some kind of youth group shindig and he decided to join (why…? He was in college so….not sure) and my sister and I were watching him walk across the grassy lawn from a distance and our conversation went something like this:

B:  Who’s that?
A:  I don’t know.
B:  He’s kind of cute.
A:  Yeah. He has a really strong jaw line.

Behold:

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This is exactly how he looked when we met but I’ve remedied the haircut, don’t worry.

The only thing I really remember about that night was that I was sitting on a picnic table eating Cheetos and I kept sharing them with Jeremy because it was an excuse to talk/flirt with him and he was taking them from me because it was an excuse to eat free food.

I think we crossed paths in church a couple more times and then I went camping with a family from our church.  On the last day a bunch of people from the church rode up to the lake to have a cook-out with all the campers and Jeremy drove in his van with my sister and someone else insignificant.  Jeremy and I refer to that as The Honeysuckle Day because he and I spent a lot of time walking around picking honeysuckle.  Since he’s from Seattle he had never seen, smelled, or tasted honeysuckle so I schooled him.  We were on the way to his car to get some Tylenol because I had a headache (seriously?  I remember that detail but not what year we met?).  Later that evening Jeremy and I sat and came up with ridiculous excuses to keep sitting together and talking (me scrolling through all the music on his blackberry, him promising to e-mail it to me, me getting excited because that meant I would have his E-MAIL address) and I remember looking up and seeing my pastor who was also a close friend just smiling at us with this very knowing smile.  I would be remiss if I did not say that he had a profound influence on Jeremy and I’s actual getting together.

Thusly the e-mail relationship ensued, but right before that I had the PROFOUND revelation that Jeremy – THIS Jeremy who (luckily for him) I already had a “quiet crush” on as I so-journaled – was the same guy who completely grossed me out by cuddling during church movie night a little too much with his then-girlfriend who went on to hate me and then went on to lose because HAHA!  He’s MINEallmine! and no I will not apologize (though I did not steal him – let’s be clear – but I did keep him).  Once I got past the fact that this was the same guy, I pretty much fell in love and we proceeded to our own grossing-people-out.

Jeremy and I e-mailed and IM-ed a LOT.  My parents also have always taken in “strays” as they call them and Jeremy ended up spending a whole lot of time at our house eating and sleeping and doing homework and eating and doing laundry and sleeping and eating.  And also falling in love with me.

This post could get real long real fast so let me skip on ahead about three years.

Before Jeremy and I ever started dating we broke up.  Yes, you read that right.  I prayed about our relationship a lot and really felt that God was saying “no.”  It was very sad and quite a defining moment for us but it was also probably the best thing that ever happened to us because we took the next four months of hardly talking and always crying and fasting and praying to really  individually figure out who we were and where we stood with God.

Gradually we started re-connecting and four months later I was starting college and he was my lifeline.  He helped me register for classes, find a good dorm, figure out the dining hall, learn how and where to park, and in general he was my sanity and my best friend those first crazy-long, crazy-hard (and in retrospect crazy-short) few months of school.  We both realized that we didn’t know how to be friends without being in love and we were both praying on our own about the future of our relationship.  I read the same verse twice in one day and truly felt the Spirit confirming that now was the time for us to get together.  Literally, the next day, he asked me out.  And boy was he romantic – there was a poem and flowers and candy and a whole lot of awkwardness and it was perfect.

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Jeremy proceeded to celebrate every Valentine’s day in a way that made every single girl on campus jealous (not exaggerating).  Summer after junior year he proposed in an airplane flying over a field where he had written out “Allie, Will you marry me?”  Summer after graduation we got married.  He is the only man I’ve ever kissed.  He’s the father of my children.  He’s my provider, encourager, prayer-warrior, grass-cutter, dog-walker, massage-giver, laugh partner, shoulder to cry on, hand to hold, and my best friend.

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And THAT little novella is how we met, but if you want to hear the 79832759832977659832 details I left out, come ask me in person.