Linking with Jen, because I’m sure she’s missed me, my sarcasm, and my riveting hair-care soliloquies.
One of the benefits of being a stay-at-home-mom is that as soon as your husband comes home you get to regale him with a 45-minute stream of super-detailed stories about your exciting day. Stories about closet organization, nap-time productivity, exactly how many people were in each check-out line at Kroger, how many coupons you used/left at home/got rejected by the checker, and how much better your hair is doing now that you switched conditioner. The other day I was excitedly telling the tale of my hair’s vast improvement since I switched to TreSemme Climate Protection and I was pleasantly surprised when Jeremy responded with, “Oh yeah, I saw that conditioner in the shower” instead of his usual, “Yeah… Wait what? Sorry….” Me: You were looking at my conditioner? Jeremy: Yeah, I was wondering what this weird global warming soap is all about. Me: Global warming soap? You mean because it’s called climate protection? Jeremy: Yeah, I thought that was weird. Me: It’s called that because it protects your hair from the climate, not because it protects the climate from…your hair. Jeremy: Yeah, I figured that out after I looked at it.
That was so much funnier when it happened than it seems now…. Ok.
Malachi is improving his pronoun usage slowly but surely, although he still refers to himself as “Mal-chi” most of the time instead of the generic “I.” Mal-chi do it! Mal-chi want orange juice! Mal-chi go paaaaaark! He’s still a little unclear on the whole personal pronoun thing and frequently says “My” instead of “I.” My do it! My eat snack! MY feed doggie! Which always reminds me of this:
…so me-sa maybe start calling him Jar Jar. How wude!
I’ve always had really vivid, realistic dreams, especially when I am pregnant. But over the past couple years I’ve started dreaming in movie. My dreams actually switch from one scene to the next, switch perspective, and have background music. Once I dreamed I was Amy in an episode of Big Bang Theory. Not only was the entire dream pretty funny but it also had laugh tracks in the background. I’m a little concerned for my sanity at this point.
Jeremy and I finally watched Frozen last night and of course I loved it, just like the rest of the world. (Unrelated spoiler alert: Why didn’t the troll just tell them the secret in the first place? Would that not have saved 15 or so years of familial heartbreak and malfunction and potential future therapy costs? Anyway.)
Have you seen the guy that sang a cover of “Let it Go” in all these different Disney voices?
The part with Scuttle absolutely cracked me up because I used to do that. Malachi was pretty freaked out by the whole thing until we got to Winnie the Pooh. Then he looked at the little picture and said, “Hi Innie Poo! Is so cute!”
Have you heard of Listia? It’s like E-bay, but free. It’s mostly a colossal waste of time, but I am 600 Pampers Rewards Points away from getting Malachi a free Cozy Coupe and I can usually muster up enough Listia credits to win some Pampers points auctions and you don’t care. Anyway, I listed an auction mostly for the bonus points but the woman who won had a problem and so an e-mail conversation ensued. Basically I would write her a thorough, polite, grammatically correct e-mail offering several solutions plus an apology and she would respond with something along the lines of:
“yeah it didnt work”
I mean, seriously. Can you not throw in a “Thank you” or at least some gratuitous punctuation? Does this kind of thing bother anyone else? Answer: yes. (Language alert, FYI).
Also, if you want to join Listia, please use my link – I will be forever grateful. https://www.listia.com/signup/5477022
It snowed again last week and Malachi’s make-up day was cancelled, so now we are having a make-up make-up day and of course they are calling for snow next Tuesday as well. I was “re-re-re-re ‘cited” about his first-ever school pictures but they aren’t offering a snow date for that so I’m just gonna save myself from the agony of dashed hopes and just operate on the assumption that those will get canceled as well. But maybe I’ll try and do some cute portraits on my own because, you know, my track record is THE BOMB. .
The other day I went into the farmer’s market by myself and got a little confused and overexcited by the free samples at the cheese shop. I ended up spending 20 dollars on cheese because it was so tasty when taken out of context and seasoned with “I’m here alone and I need to reign myself in!” Then when my sister and I pulled it out to eat together it honestly smelled like a hot, sizzling cow patty and tasted about the same. I decided to return it because, seriously. When I took it back the manager said, “This is how this cheese smells and tastes. Did you not see on the wrapper? It’s called ‘Barnyard Smell.’ I’ll refund it but if you don’t like it, don’t ever buy it.” So I guess she was right and I am grateful she refunded my money even though she treated me like a 2-year-old the whole time and wouldn’t let me finish a sentence. But for real? They made it smell like cow poop on purpose? WHY?! Bon appetit.
I wish I could come up with one word to describe 2013, but I’m not sure what to choose. Maybe it would be “fast” – my memories of Christmas 2012 are crystal clear because it seems like just yesterday. My memories of newborn Naomi are already fuzzy because that is what it’s like to have a baby. Any stage other than their current one seems so far removed you sometimes wonder if it even happened to you. I watch videos of Malachi from 8, 9, 10 months ago and it’s hard to believe this little boy was ever that little boy. Maybe I would choose “hard” – because focusing all my attention on one child at a time gives me a twinge of guilt almost every time, no matter which kid. Because on the day I think I’ve never been more exhausted, that night I lay awake with a squirming baby and realize that now I have. Because consistently spending time with the Lord has never been so difficult for me. Because anytime I make progress in one area of life I fall behind in another. But maybe I would choose “joy” – because there has never been a happier, more smiley, more laid-back baby than Naomi. Because my son has finally broken past the barrier and can speak clearly and efficiently and is so much happier for it. Because my endless stream of photos and videos attests to the beautiful memories we have made this year. Maybe I’ll just choose all three.
And if I were to pick a word (ok, two words) for this coming year, I will declare them over my home and my family and myself and prophetically choose “peace” and “love.” Not because I’m some kind of hippie, but because if there’s anything this house needs, it’s a little more peace so the abundant love we already have for the Lord and for one another can be a little more obvious, a little more dominant, and a little more in-control.
Thanks for sticking through the sappiest and most flowery introduction to date. Onto the cooler stuff: 7 quick takes about 2013.
January – We discovered the neighborhood farm, Malachi learned to sit at the big table and give real hugs, and he experienced his first snow.
February – One night I went to bed early because I thought I was having regular, painless contractions. The next morning when I woke up they continued but at the same frequency and pain(less)-level. So Jeremy went to work, Malachi and I played, I bought an app called “labor mate,” made myself cry when I put Malachi down for his nap because intuitively I knew this was the last time it would ever be just me and him (crying again, btw), mopped the kitchen floor, did some yoga, finally decided to go to the hospital, found out I was SIX CENTIMETERS PEOPLE, and three very-natural hours later, sweet baby Naomi Kate was born to change our lives forever. Malachi was overjoyed. Eventually he got used to her and even learned to share.
March and April – March included a lot of sweet moments, like this:
According to a quick skim of my daily kid log, I went to Goodwill at least 3 times with both kids in April. We also really settled into being a family of four. I remember feeling really content with just “being” with my kids. I wasn’t super stressed about things with Naomi (she slept through the night for two months starting in April) and Malachi was doing really well with her, too. Also, I started my blog in April.
May, June, and July – In May my baby boy turned two. Naomi rolled over, laughed, and settled into a great schedule. In June we went to Seattle. Re-reading some of my highlights of July makes me remember how much I LOVE summer and how much happier we all are when it is sunshiney outside. We did so much partying, playing outside, swimming, and fun stuff in July. Malachi started making developmental strides (colors, numbers) and we visited his pre-school for the first time. We also hosted two Brazilian girls for a long weekend and I got really, really secondhomesick.
August and September – In August I started harvesting things from my first-ever garden. It was encouraging and discouraging all at the same time, but I’ll definitely do it again (just way differently). August was also a little hard – Naomi had major sleep problems and Malachi started hitting her. Having two young kids started to get a lot harder than it had been before. In September we visited my best friend and her family, Malachi started preschool, Naomi started eating insane amounts of food (this trend continues), and we went to several festivals.
October and November – In October we went camping, Malachi potty-trained, Malachi and I had a very intense supernatural experience with the Lord, and Naomi started standing on her own. In November I began my ongoing trend of slacking off on blogging. Malachi made huge strides in his speech. We enjoyed a wonderful Thanksgivng.
December – I love the Christmas season! We had so much fun family time this month. The kids LOVED Christmas, baby Jesus, Santa, and presents. Naomi took her first steps. Malachi became obsessed with the guitar. Malachi was the cutest Christmas angel ever.
Happy New Year! Now go see Jen for much bigger and better.
**Ummmm, also…. I just reread this and realized I only talked about my kids. Wow. I guess that’s what I get for using my daily kid log to remind me of the year…. if you wanted any news about me and Jeremy, sorry to disappoint! Better luck next year when I’m not too tired to go back and edit.
First of all, I hate going so long between posts. It seriously annoys me and sometimes I wonder how I could possibly not have found enough time to write a post but somehow I managed to stay up-to-date on all my shows. I guess it’s because I almost never watch my shows with out simultaneously doing something else more productive, which further confirms for me that I am too busy. And this post is going downhill fast because holy boring so let me entertain you with the list of shows I watch on a regular basis and include a clip from each because it’s Saturday and I know you need to fill your useless video quota:
-Parenthood – Maybe my favorite show ever. It is so real and relate-able and I’m pretty sure I’ve cried in at least 50% of the episodes I’ve seen. If that’s not a recommendation I don’t know what is.
-Parks and Recreation – Not entirely appropriate – full disclosure here. But it is HILARIOUS. (this clip contains a bad word)
(And perhaps I am Leonard.)
-Downton Abbey – because the British accents and cool outfits fooled me into believing it wasn’t a shloozey soap opera for about 10 seconds.
I’m just gonna do us all a favor and stop there.
K so. We went camping. All four of us. And thankfully we waited until mid-October so the weather would be nice and fallish and Virginia accommodated us by being 86 degrees on Saturday. But the nights were cool and Malachi got to go swimming so it all worked out. The kids had all sorts of fun swimming, hiking, getting dirty, playing on the playground, notsleeping in the tent, and doing really rustic, campy things like watching the iPod for hours on end every time we needed one of them to be still long enough to cook dinner. It was really great though – we will definitely do it again. .
So. You know how people say things sometimes like, “She’s so happy she poops rainbows” or whatever? Well. Pooping rainbows is not a skill that any of the Dillingers possess, and believe you me, if it was this whole potty training thing would be a lot more exciting. I think rainbows would be easier to clean out of the carpet. And I know you are thinking, “Yay! More potty training talk!” so I will be a good little blogger and indulge you. We started again yesterday and after I declared that the star chart would fill up faster if we renamed it “I went on the carpet,” Malachi finally got the message and has done really well since. Let’s hope he gets it down by Tuesday (don’t pop my bubble, I know) because this whole sitting at home all day staring at your naked kid thing is getting kind of old. Kind of fast.
Although yesterday I did venture out of the house to go grocery shopping. I waiting until the kids were in bed and dragged my exhausted self to the store to buy a flipping MOUNTAIN of groceries because I knew it was better than waiting til Monday and taking both kids. Got all the way through the check-out line and got carded for the first time in a looooong time (my theory is that they never card women with kids) and discovered….crap. No wallet. No ID. No money. No card. No dignity. The nice woman behind me offered to buy my “mommy juice” because “you need it” (I blamed my brainlessness on potty-training) but I had to put my cart in customer service, drive home and get the wallet, drive back and pay for groceries whilst having a panic attack when I realized I had almost 0 gas, get gas, drive back home, put groceries away, and then collapse on the couch with crackers and cookies and TV. But the whole time I was just grateful. Thank you God that the lady behind me is nice. Thank you that I wasn’t buying ice cream. Thank you that I didn’t run out of gas. Thank you that no one hit me when I ran that red light. THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU that my kids weren’t with me. Thank you that they didn’t make me start over. And let me tell you – that was totally a God-thing because God-in-Allie is grateful even when life stinks but Allie-in-Allie is just ticked off. And then I got home with 29 bananas. I’m not sure where the 21 came from that I didn’t pick up but I’m pretty sure some other late-night shopper is pretty annoyed now that they have to go back to the store before they can make their banana pudding or whatever.
I bought a new pair of Tom’s this week and I’m so excited. I joined ebates and their cash back combined with the 10-dollar coupon and free shipping Toms was offering caused the rational, must-save-the-most-money-possible-at-all-times part of my shopping persona to feel like, THIS IS IT. BUY THEM NOW. But after I bought them I started feeling really conflicted because, although Tom’s one-for-one thing sounds great in theory, in practice it actually can be really dependency-producing and local-economy-stunting. But on the other hand, maybe it’s still better than buying shoes made by some underage kid in a sweatshop somewhere? I really don’t know.
The steam…. it runneth out. Oh! Let’s make a case for impulse buying because it’s Saturday and you all just got paid. A few months ago my sister and I went to an Avett Brothers concert and I said it then and I’ll say it again – if you don’t like the Avett Brothers you are no longer invited to my life. Anyway, there was this awesome poster they were selling there – designed by an artist, unique to the city we were in, numbered, high-quality, etc. My sister bought one and I thought, “That’s appropriate. Her house is all musical and quirky and it fits.” And then I looked at the price and thought, $25 bucks for a poster? Uh. No. And you know what? Three months later I STILL regret it. Like, you’ve heard of buyer’s remorse? This is called tightwad’s remorse. Anyhoo, occasionally I’d look on ebay or something in vain but yesterday….I FOUND IT. And it’s beautiful. And I will either buy it or beg for it for Christmas but either way… it’s 40 bucks. FORTY. And if I had just bought it on impulse in the first place it would have been 27.5% cheaper but:
Well look at me getting to number 7 already (already = hours later). I’m getting new glasses today for the first time in four years and I am super, super psyched but also nervous to pick them out myself for the first time ever. Hopefully I don’t post a picture of myself next time looking a hot-mess, but hey! At least it will be a different kind of hot mess and I guess that counts for something.
So originally this was gonna be kind of a cop-out post. I wasn’t feeling terribly inspired to blog, but then I realized I wasn’t feeling terribly inspired to fold laundry, either, and if I was just gonna sit on the couch and waste time I ought to post something and this seemed easy. But the more I thought about it, the more introspective I got. Dangerous.
So without further ado – 7 things I learned about myself on Pinterest.
I’m not as servant-hearted as I thought.
This is sooooo me. Here I am thinking I’m gonna serve others by opening the door for them or letting them over in traffic but I get no head nod or acknowledgmental wave or “thanks” and then I turn all, “You’re WELcome! Geesh!” After I pinned this I realized how pathetic that was. But then I wonder… am I really not servant-hearted, or is it something else? In spiritual gifts tests I always test really high in the justice/judgment category, which basically means I have a very strong and clear sense of right and wrong. So if I do the right thing for someone and it’s not met with the “right” response it seriously ruffles my feathers. But if they do thank me, it gives me a mini and quick emotional high. Still, though, I’d rather just be glad to serve regardless of the response.
I’m getting over the goo-goo-gah-gah-everything-baby-is-so-cute stage. See that goooorgeous bag up there? That’s my next diaper bag. I’ve been through four different diaper bags so far and the one I have now is by far my favorite. It’s convenient, smart, easy to carry, and UGLY. If it could talk all it would say all day long is, “Look! I’m a diaper bag! I hold diapers! The woman carrying me is a MOM because I’m a DIAPER BAG!” and I’m just over it. Convenient as it may be, I’m ready for a cute bag that can house my purse essentials (i.e. everything) and the diaper bag essentials for two kids and not be such an ugly piece of ugly. So PLEASE help me choose, because I am super torn: this or this?
I’ve been lying about the birthday party thing. To myself and others.
For Malachi’s first and second birthdays we just had small affairs. A few balloons, family, one friend, a cake. It was WONDERFUL and he was happy. Little kids don’t need huge parties – they won’t remember them, it’s a waste of money, they are happy just to be with the people they love. It’s all true. Except…I want to have a theme party for my kids! With a ridiculous cake! And favors! And coordinated games! And other kids! I do. I admit it. It’s out there now. I feel better?
I’m too busy.
This is a really hard one. I realize it when I scroll through my pins and see project after project after project that I want to do that I haven’t had time for. The gallery wall. The once-a-month-cooking. The memento organization. I know that having two kids under three is HARD and that some days I will get nothing done and that’s ok. But I still feel like I can’t JUST do the homemaker thing. I need to stay involved in something else, right? Like my ESL program, directing missions at our church, hosting a small group, attending Bible study, mentoring girls from our church… I don’t know what or how to cut out. But if I use my free time to hang out on Pinterest and Facebook, it’s not because I’m a bad prioritizer – it’s because I’m too tired to do anything else. I’m gonna have to mull this over for a while, I think. (<— Case in point: I started this post yesterday.) .
I am less bohemian than I think I am. I had a ten-dollar Kohl’s gift certificate come in the mail this week and I got really excited because I’ve been wanting to buy these harem pants ever since I saw how cute they looked on Grace. Apparently I am a whooooooole lot taller than she is because harems that scrunch at the ankles = cute but harems that don’t even touch your ankles = story of my life. I was in speed-shop mode because my kids were with me but guess what I came out of the store with instead? A coral-colored striped baseball tee. It’s cute and comfy and soft and it has thin, horizontal stripes just like roughly 50% of my shirts do. And it’s coral, like roughly 30% of my clothes are. I like to think I’m all cute and bohemian but when it comes right down to it I think my style is more “comfy, stripey stuff.” Which is actually kind of annoying.
I still have some pretty big questions that I need to work through.
Take a look at my books to read board or my spiritual growth board and there are some big, big topics there. Homosexuality. Violence and pacifism. The atrocities of the Old Testament. I’ve been reading this book since before Naomi was born and I can’t recommend it highly enough. It has helped me immensely in sorting out some questions about God and in understanding some of His complexities. Having questions at first can be terrifying – it shakes you to your core. But the coolest part about the quest to answer them is realizing that God is not waiting at the end of your search – He is in the journey.
I should maybe cut back on the boob-talk.
We can just chalk that one up to the family I was raised in.
Now tell me: What can you learn about yourself by taking an objective look at your Pinterest?
Let’s just re-name this one “Seven separate blogs in one” because that would be more honest. Joining Jen and the masses (<—unintentional pun that most people won’t get but I still think is funny.)
Wherrrrrrrre tooooo beginnnnn…… Ah. Let’s talk about the “Cups” song. You know that song “You’re gonna miss me when I’m gone” which is actually called Cups? When I first saw Pitch Perfect I Googled the song for my Dad and came up with the original-ish version by LuLu and the Lampshades and felt all cool and indie because I Facebook-followed some UK band no one ever heard of. (Holy run-on sentence.) And then whatshername from Twilight did her own too-fast and too-much version and it became a huge hit. But lu-HONG before the song or even before I knew anything about Full House my sister and I and our sister-best-friends were doing the cup thing in a round while singing Knick Knack Paddy Whack Give a Dog a Bone. All that to say that I can now sing and perform “Cups” and I feel awesome but really my most enraptured audience is my son who likes to smack and throw a cup around with me while I sing. And for the record, this is by far the coolest version I’ve stumbled across:
Let’s talk pre-school. My worstest fears came true and Malachi cried for over an hour straight on his first day before the nice teachers finally just called me to come get him. The second day I stayed for an hour and then left. He bawled his eyeballs out for about five minutes and then did fine. The third day I stayed for five minutes and he was calm by the time I left the room. The fourth day he got mad at me because I put his juice in the wrong place and he kept asking if his friend “Jalkdjl” (best translation I can muster) could come with us. He’s only gone four days so far and he already says “yewo” instead of “ye-yee” and has started stringing words. He’s also much more cuddly with me than before because I think he misses me. Heart = mush. It’s also been really nice to have some time with just Naomi. She sleeps most of the time he is gone but when she’s awake I realize what a HUGE difference it makes to have a baby to yourself with no one else around. I forget how easily distracted I can be just by having Malachi around, even if he is behaving. It’s nice to be able to make her giggle or play with her without constantly answering questions or checking to make sure Malachi hasn’t gotten into anything he’s not supposed to.
A while ago I wrote a post about finding unity between Catholicism and Evangelicalism and this past week Jen (who hosts 7 quick takes every week so you know you love her!) commented on my post and told me it was great food for thought. I was so excited on the more serious side because the post was all about building bridges and it felt like maybe God had used my post to build one. And I was so excited on the less serious side because OH MY WORD JEN FROM CONVERSION DIARY COMMENTED ON MY BLOG!!!!!!
I am an avid couponer and I have saved us tons of money on our grocery/toiletry/medicine/diaper bill over the last couple years but the truth is that money saved does not always equal money in hand. This month I’ve successfully sold something on Craig’s List and participated in a local consignment sale that’s made us a little extra money as well. I have to say that it’s really rewarding to feel like I’m contributing something to the budget again, small though it may be.
Labor Day weekend we went to visit one of my closest friends and her family. We had so much fun – it really made me realize how much I miss having her here. Our kids are really close in age and they love each other. She and I stayed up waaaay too late talking and really could have kept on. Our husbands are friends, too. It was great. We even got our kids to pose really well for some group shots: One thing I noticed while were there was A) how ADORABLE their cottage-style house is and B) how uncluttered and simple it was. Erin had just enough decorations in just the right places to feel homey and welcoming but not like you had just walked into the middle of a hobby shop like someone else I know’s house….ahem. Anyways, we came home and I immediately started weeding. I took stuff off my kitchen walls and counters, spread stuff out, and put things in a yard sale pile but now the problem is the laundry basket of decorations that I DO want to keep but don’t have anywhere to put. I did decide to hang one picture in the laundry room but other than that I don’t know how to use my stuff without going back to my clutterful ways. So I’m kind of stuck.
Naomi continues to eat like a 20-year-old college boy home on break. This morning for breakfast after nursing she ate an ENTIRE pear. The other night for dinner she had half an avocado AND half a mango. Malachi has an uncanny and definitely NOT genetic sense of rhythm so it wouldn’t surprise me if he becomes a dancer or drummer or something but I’m wondering if Naomi’s first extracurricular activity should be competitive eating. That or competitive pooping because…..for real.
Poop, there it is.
Well, I think I’ve succeeded once again in stunting my readership growth rate by discussing super-exciting things like de-cluttering and poop. I think I’ve done my duty for the day. Be sure to tune in tomorrow as I delve into the entrancing subject of the best dish soap ever or maybe I’ll go hard core and tell you what I dreamed about the night before. It’s gonna be epic.
Linking with Jen and this is gonna be fastfastfast because I wasn’t even planning on posting and I really don’t have time. And if THAT doesn’t say, “I love you dear readers” I don’t know what does. So let’s make this a linky list instead of the usual. (I tried to say “uszh” but I’m not sure how to spell it….)
This blog post is one of the BEST I have ever read. Even after she had to remove her hilarious pictures (sob!) I still love it. I don’t talk about it often (ok, maybe I do) but I am a huge breastfeeding supporter/promoter/believer and it’s awesome to hear so much support and also so much humor that I TOTALLY get. And since I won’t be getting 1.5 million unexpected views on my blog, here is my favorite picture she had that she later removed:
Books I want to read: Fight (A Christian Case for Nonviolence) because it is veeerrrrryyyyy interesting (for lack of a better term) being a usually-anti-war (but always pro-troops!), anti-death-penalty, mostly conservative Christian in the south. Wow, I’m revealing all sorts of new stuff about myself today. Also, the author of this book co-authored a book with Francis Chan that I dearly loved, so. There’s that. I also want to read Grace-Based Parenting because that concept was rolling around in my head verbatim since I had my first child and it’s something I aspire to and fail at daily. I’d love some perspective and clarity. And on a much more shallow note, Death Comes to Pemberly. Because I am a Jane Austin addict but she is dead and I need SOMETHING to fill in the gap. Book donations always appreciated.
Ok, number three and I’m already out of links (and brain cells). Speaking of being out of brain cells, I almost forgot about Malachi’s pre-school orientation today but thankfully I DID remember and it was great. I think he’s going to love it but I dread the crying leave-taking that I KNOW is coming. He starts Tuesday so, prayers for myself and him and also myself much coveted.
For the 98% of you who linked over here from Facebook, this is old news (yawn) but I’d like to just point out that since my daughter started solids less than two weeks ago she’s eaten an entire butternut squash, 2 sweet potatoes, a whole pear, a whole banana, 2 jars of peas, 2 jars of prunes, and 2 jars of blueberry applesauce. And she’s heeeee-yuuuuge. .
Maybe blogging at 9:45 at night when I should be getting ready for bed and a 4-hour trip tomorrow is not a great idea after all.
For some reason this week a lightbulb turned on and Malachi has figured out how to pronounce things correctly(er). For example, he now says “ba” for ball instead of “dee.” He can say “Fo” (four) and “dah-puh” (diaper) and “chich” (church). This is a big leap for him and it makes me really excited. If he can say “music” soon instead of “da-sich” I will be one very happy mother. He’s been pretty behind in his development all along, so it was also encouraging today when the preschool teachers talked about focusing on a color a month and I’m like, “My son KNOWS his colors and is VERY familiar with ye-yee already, thank you.” He also is really, really interested in letters and reading and is watching Wheel of Fortune with even more rapt attention than usual.
If you’ve lasted this long I feel like I should reward you so let me send you on to happier and funnier pastures. If you like to make fun of dumb Pinterest pins, this is your new best friend. If you want to feel really old when you’re not that old, check out this one. Refreshing perspective on dealing with curse words here. And trust, me this is a good idea. I know because I said the mother of all curse words once, was told not to repeat it, and promptly asked my other parent what it meant who was so taken aback that that was the day I got THE talk. The birds and bees talk. And on that note….. Bye.
Every mom will tell you that silence is not golden but instead is whatever color suspicion is. Naomi goes down for her nap during Malachi’s lunch time, which seems like a great idea because he is a prisoner of his high chair and I can spend however long it takes to get her screaming, arching, razzing, flipping person to just reLAX and go to SLEEP. Today when I walked back out to the mess hall Malachi had been saying “uh-oh” for a couple minutes which is code for “I did something bad and I’m trying to pass it off as an accident.” Upon closer inspection I realized he was SOAKED in milk. Since Naomi was napping I couldn’t access his closet so I grabbed the first clean shirt I could find in the laundry pile and he wore this gem of an outfit for the rest of the day: Hot mess. Don’t blame me for the 1 sock which somehow doesn’t match either his green stripey shirt or blue camo shorts in this ensemble – he picked them out himself.
Yesterday at approx 2 in the p.m. I went out to pick some veggies from my garden and my oft-drunk neighbor was possibly enjoying the happiest hour of his life ifyouknowwhatImean. He was standing on his front porch, shirtless, drinking a can of beer, pointing at nothing in the middle of the street, and singing “Drop it Like it’s Hot” at the top of his lungs. When I got up on our deck within eye-shot of him I nervously scampered inside because I didn’t want him to see me and try to conversate because…no. I did briefly consider dropping it like it was hot in the confines of my yard where no one could see but the stink bugs, but I decided against it. Especially after he switched to the next song and started screaming “I’m a gangsta! You don’t want me in yo neiba-hood!” There might be some truth to that…
On Wednesday Jenny asked us to find out our personality type and since I love love love love love all manner of self-analysis multiple-choice stuff (LOVE), I did it. I am INFJ and though I didn’t put much stock into it at first, when I read this description I was blown away. Blown. A. Way. Quiet exterior, deep convictions, good with languages, writes better than they speak, has tons of opinions that they only express to a few people (!!!), comes across standoffish….seriously this might warrant another post in the future. Take yours and tell me what you are. Really!
I’m writing this on Thursday night (cheater). That stupid butterfly that I kicked the other night is now going off ON ITS OWN. I can hear it through the monitor. I’ve never liked butterflies (except real ones) and maybe it knows and it’s out to get me. I’m afraid it will wake Malachi up. And all this is significant enough to me that I am sharing it with the web-i-verse. Get a life, Allie.
So this right here? DISGUSTING. In case you are too lazy to click the link (I know you are), here’s a picture:
Naomi has a cold and I can’t clear her nose for the life of me, but now I think maybe I should just stop trying. It seems my only other options are battery-powered aspirators (too expensive for Mrs. Coupon Crazy) or those snot suck things which, I mean, I KNOW that the “straw” (ew ew ew) has a blocker doohicky but… It just creeps me out too much. I wonder if my laziness would actually pay off though, because I only ever wipe off Naomi’s blue thing (which Malachi calls “Nee!” which means “Nose!”) – I don’t actually wash it out. Maybe it’s not moldy because of that? I don’t know, but I kind of want to cut it in half now to check.
I took the kids to see Toy Story 3 at the library this week (and yes, the library is my second home, thanks for asking). I’d never seen it either and I actually cried. Like, more than once. I have a pretty good poker face and ability to hide my emotions (feel free to psychoanalyze that however you like) at first I thougt, “No. NO. I will not cry. Don’t be stupid. This is a kid’s movie.” By the second time I’m just thinking, “This is SO embarrassing. I need to get my junk together before they turn the lights on. Geez.”
It did make me feel a wee bit guilty though. I had so many stuffed animals as a child that they filled about 10 large outdoor black garbage bags. Over the years I whittled it down to 5 bags, then 2, and now I have most of my stuffed animals in a toy hammock in the kids’ room because I can justify keeping them “for my kids!” even though they can’t even reach the hammock, much less tell what’s in it. Pathetically, though, I have another bag of animals upstairs in a storage closet that I love too much to even share with my kids and they are MINEallMINE! I need to give some of them away. What’s the best place to give them to?
This weekend we’re off to visit my dad’s family in their new house which we haven’t seen yet. I’m excited but also dreading the whole Malachi-clinging-to-my-body-like-a-leech thing that happens when he is in an unfamiliar place. Say a prayer for us!